March 7, 2007
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Single, Married..... or (grimace) Divorced!
Why are those always the three choices when filling out things like applications or registrations or whatever the form is you have to fill out??? Yes, I've been divorced, but I am SINGLE. It's like the choices have this stigma to them - and "DIVORCED" - well, if you mark that box, then we know somethng about you now....WTF is that? Why is it even a choice? You are either married or you aren't. I'm so tired of feeling forced to check that box because I am. It's been almost four years. I am now almost divorced longer than I was married. And I certainly have been "single" for way longer than I was married. Why do I have to wear a scarlet letter because I got married and my husband turned out to be a lying cheating ass hole so its over? Why is this one mistake so important to distinguish on my application for a credit card, or my new online account at Target.com?? I just don't understand why this is so important to society. Particularly with half of marriages failing in the first place. I understand why it might be useful to acknowledge you have a spouse....perhaps someone who would be on the account or someone who would use the account or simply for marketing purposes. But what does it matter if I'm single vs divorced and single??? Why isn't it the same!? Obviously I am having a rant here. Probably because once you've gone through a hell like that, and you are still young enough to hope you can still make a decent go of it in life, you do NOT want to be constantly reminded of the one mistake you made....that you've now corrected. It infuriates me.
Yeah, I know, I need to take a chill pill. But it really bothers me. There isn't a box for "student" "non student" and "flunked out". Either you are in school or you aren't. Why is it necessary for this group to be singled out? I need to understand this. In the meantime, I am going to start checking the "single" box. Because I am.
Comments (232)
heyy donnnt worry!
im here for yoiu if you neeeed me!
and good uck with your plan!
xoxooxoxoxooxxoxoxooxoxox
That would completely piss me off too especially considering that in most of the cases you described it isn't even relevant information. WTF! I would totally mark Single because it can be argued that single is broader than just divorced and therefore encompasses divorced people as well - if that makes sense.
Anyway, phew, you got ME all worked up now!
Thanks for your nice message! I love getting new comments and that is awesome that you remember Jane too! Totally the leotards. Rule.
Good luck today and tonight!
xo
i think its perfectly OK for you to check off 'single'. and to be completely honest I'm 99% sure the only reason its on there is for market research and statistical purposes. Its important to know a divorcee's buying patterns and compare them to other divorcee patterns so they can see what works and what doesn't and cater to more divorcees, since there's a very large and growing population of them!
I'm still ticked that they want me to differentiate between male or female but its all for the same reason...balance in sales. or, in jobs, affirmative action.
Saw you on boosted content.
I was filling out a college app online and the only options it gave for "Parents' status" were Divorced, Separated, and Other.
But yeah, I don't see why anybody should require that information.
Saw your blog was featured and your sn was Eponine2: love it and your tagline.
I completely concur that you should not be required to mark the divorced box. Really, it is quite insensitive and one will note that there is not a box for a widow. Some people have no sense.
My congratulations upon being one of the few who does.
I have a similar reaction to standard application and government forms that necessarily ask for my ethnicity. "Race" is a social construct, a conceit and yet it is so important. I have to pick "Hispanic/Latino" and whoever reviews this form is going to bring in so many of their preconceived notions. Yes I feel your pain.
u r totally right! more power to you!
That's a really good point; after being divorced, it's single again so why would they have it different. I guess I can understand for college purposes though because then both parents are entitled to pay for the kid (unless in only one parent's custody, though I'm not entirely sure how that works). I'm guessing for some of the forms, it is just for statistical purposes, which is kind of disturbing. But they might also ask because you could have been dependent on someone else's accounts, or have shared one and thus the bank needs to know. In this case I think they are probably asking for financial reasons. I don't think they mean to make you emotional
And I know it's a constant reminder, but you have got to keep your chin up ^-^ because no one can completely know what others are going through and have their own reasons (may they be completely ridiculous or not) for asking questions. Don't let other people bum you down; if you accept who you are and what you've been through, it will be easier to deal with people who do not have a clue about you but might want to get to know you (here I'm not just talking about forms).
In the meanwhile, Xanga is a great place to vent your anger and let off your steam and move on with your life
And sorry about what's happened, but you seem like a strong person and I have confidence you will be just fine.
I know what you mean. I have always felt the same way about those forms or applications. Why do they even need to know anyway? I agree you're either single or married.
http://www.adambourque.com
because they are not allowed to ask if you have kids. If you are young (20's or 30's) then more than likely if you are divorced then you have young kids. Young kids mean more time off of work. My theory anyway!
Saw you on featured content...
I work in HR and I think it's on applications because most times it means you have a former name that you went by, it acts as an indicator for us to look for you with a different name? But, regardless of why, I would definitely check the box you feel better about!!!
Take care!
You've got a good point.
Also, I just thought of something. It really doesn't matter for any application, but why do they assume if you're not married/divorced, then you're single? What about unmarried people who are in a relationship? It's not that big of a deal, but still...
I say they change applications to either "married" or "unmarried." It's as simple as that.
Good point. I don't understand why they need to know that information anyhow. Nosy bastards!
Hey I know what you mean cause I am going through it right know cause my husband is in love with another woman that he knew for 27 years. Then me and him got married in 2001 and then we have been separated on and off through our relationship and now we are fixing to get a divorce. If you ever need anything please respond on my website and I will give you any advice that I can.
I would think that it wouldn't matter if you wanted to check single, still it's a good question. The only things I can think of is that maybe if you have used a different name... that's about all I can come up with.
I agree certain those question is too personal, like being divorce going corrupt us from paying our bills.
browsin meetin new pple as makin friend. have a great day!
What if you remarried? Would you still be expected to check off "divorced" instead of "married?"
If not (and you wouldn't be, of course), you should definitely check "single" now, too. I totally agree with you.
you should just check 'single' because why should you feel compelled to tell the whole world that you're divorced?
check the single box. divorce doesn't define you...it's a phase you had to go through to be who you are now. damn the stupids who made up the forms. you know the govt just want to keep tabs on you
Wow, I never really thought about that before. You're definately right! They should really think about changing those forms. You check that single box!!
Oh, and I LOVE your screename! I didn't even notice it at first. Les Miz is the best!!! I'm obsessed with that musical and book. Do you hear the people sing?
hey yeah i agree i totally dont see what the difference is i never graduated high school i had to drop out when i was 16 but from the year i was 16 til 17 i busted my ass studying so i can get my ged and on my resume i have to put i got my ged and never graduated and shit like that and people look down on my for dropping out without them giving me a second to explain the situation i was in and why i had to drop out of high school stupid people i tell you single divorced married engaged so what does it really matter now days
i have a friend who is divorced and is seeing someone else(i dont agree with who but thats another story) so if she gets engaged is she divorced in a relationship or engaged i dont see how you can be all of them
just like i dont see how you can be divorced and single i look at divorced meaning you arent ready to move on that you are still where did things go wrong as in single is i'm single i'm not married ect...
sorry for that bit of rant i saw it and i just had to put my input
In all fairness, the choice should be "never married, currently married, and previously married."
My how the grass is always greener. I'm single. Never been married. But sometimes its easier just to tell people i've been divorced because then they're like "oh ok" and move on. They think i'm less wierd for being divorced than for never being married.
How ironic is that...
mmmm,
what if they treat it like they treat minorities?
some places will hire you because youre a minority
and some places won't.
I am divorced and feel the same way. I understand exactly what is going in your heart when you are at the moment that takes your mind to probably the worst moments of your life. Jesus died for divorce too, and all the sins that led to it. Im not the best person in the world, Im not good. I understand Jesus, and the box for do you believe Jesus died for your sins is checked in my life. The world treats me like shit for many things, but Jesus is the One who will confront them with their stones in their hands and they will all drop....look at John chapter 8. Im not sure if your a christian or not, and Im not trying to be all preachy but marriage was Gods idea, and He cares about you, even if you failed, or even if you didnt fail and are a victim. Jesus cares. People usually just plain suck, but Jesus cares.
charles
you make some awesome points. check single from now on, lol.
They shouldn't even ask whether you're single or married (unless there's a discount for being one of those). it's none of their beezwax! If I want my spouse or anyone else to share an account, i'll ask for it!
Nice post
I have no idea who you are, but the Single box would be the correct option! I fully agree.
Wow, I never even thought about that. I always knew there was the "divorced" option... but now that I read your entry...why??? Being divorced is the same thing as being single! I like your reference to the scarlet letter.
I also took a quick glance at a comment above... Les Miz! I just saw some of my friends perform in it, in a school musical. hehe. It was terrific. Poor Eponine.
Wow that's frustrating:(
To add to your rant...what about those who get remarried? They don't have to check the Divorced but remarried box. They just get to go back to married. I don't understand. Check the single box!
BTW, I'm sorry that you had to go through such a hell.
oh! I'm sorry. Well I'm single too, and I don't mind uf you check that box! Welcome back to the club!!!!
I hope you do check the single box from now on. In my opinion, it should be your choice as to whether you call yourself "single" or "divorced." Good for you!
hi.it's my special one birthday on the coming 31st May. would you please help to leave a short note to her ans spread it out. i wish i can gather 531 wishes for my beloved. thank you very very much sincerly!
http://www.xanga.com/thirtyfirstmay
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
I agree. I have been answering sex as no thanks.
I totally Agree. My boyfriend's parents have never gotten married but are still together (they don't believe in marriage) but on his FAFSA they have to say 'single' and use only one income.
Lame.
Women used to feel exactly this about having to distinguish themselves as single or married, like it mattered to their self worth whether they were a lonely spinster or were actually married off to a man.
If it bothers you, then mark that you're single. It's not like they're gonna come after you for "lying" on a form for a credit card.
instead they should have check boxes for "Miss","Ms","Mrs","Princess","Mr","Sir","Master" to tell if you're:single & enjoy teasing married people,single & hate it,casually dating whores,temporarily separated,officially divorced,re-married another bastard/high maintenance gold-digger & bitter,married but dating other people or i'll never tell
Good point, I always wondered that myself (along with many other things).
Kudos.
the real reason they ask that:
while it doesn't affect your credit score, the fact that you've been divorced does negatively reflect the ideal 50's American Christian family-type that most lenders want as borrowers. and while it absolutely isn't right for them to discriminate on such a basis, they can't necessarily put more boxes on the app to check for "my spouse was a lying, cheating asshole", "my spouse abused me", "i was unfaithful", "we mutually decided to no longer continue our marriage", or the millions of other reasons that apply to why half of all marriages end in divorce, and most within the first five years. Legally, you can get around it. It's called an annulment. If your marriage gets legally annulled, it legally never happened. And you can knock yourself out checking all the single status boxes you want. Sometimes, that dicorced box can be a blessing in disguise, though. Your creditors just want to know who they can legally hold responsible for your past credit history and your future transactions. If you had horrible credit, or just no credit at all, while you were married, that gets taken into account. How does a newly-divorced woman without "work experience" or a career history, and therefore, little credit history get on her feet so that she can depend on herself for the first time instead of her husband? That divorced box might help explain a lot of mistakes or shortcomings that might show up on a credit report. What if the financial situation of your spouse ended up ruining your credit as well? Without the proper precautions, marriage legally makes you and your spouse responsible for one another, and in the eyes of the credit world, you are, essentially, one entity. My mom, a housewife and mother of eight, could go out and get credit limits in the tens of thousands of dollars before she divorced my father simply because of my dad's good credit. Regardless of her credit, which was virtually non-existent. Once she divorced him, she was lucky to be approved for credit more than a couple thousand dollars. While you have made a clean break and simply want to move on with your life and forget that your marriage ever happened, it did, and your creditors want to know. It's not fair, and it does pre-judge a lot of people, but I can see why in some cases it might be necessary...
hiya, you dont know me, i dont know you, but i found you on featured posts, so...
check single, it's none of their business anyway!!
i agree with Charles.. but heck people dont always just plain suck, at least not all the time lol.
Check the one that makes you feel comfortable!
Don't bother by such stupid question!
Take Care!!
Yeah you are so right. It never occurred to me before even though my heart always sink a little when I have to check the Divorced box. Why the hell not Single?
Hi Cheer up~ ^^
Marriage status information required may due to statistic purpose.
Divorce is very common nowadays.
Many divorced women have very good life so dun upset about it.Get over your sorrowful mind and you will find divorce is not a big problem in life.
such a good point.
Hey, I just happened to notice your blog among many. It's early, I'm having my morning coffee, the caffine hasn't quite kicked in...but you're making a whole lot of sense. A bit of NYC advice: Fuck them. You check of 'single'. If there's a problem with that, let them write your congressman. In the meantime, you appear to have your head together (and that can be tough after a divorce, especially if the spose is the asshole). You'll be fine. I'm still married- 23 yrs long- (and while that's no party, my children make it worth hanging on). It's a matter of duty. Anyhow, rant all you like. You've earned the right. -Duke
just check "single". seriously, it won't make any difference to them but it'll make you feel better & like you're "stickin' it to the man". lol....
srry about what happened with your ex. men are scum. & I don't think you're a second-hand citizen just because a guy treated you wrong. most of us have been there before.
<3 Alexis
I guess being divorced does seem to have a stigma attached to it! Just thought though...I personally wouldn't view it as a "mistake". Just put it down as one of the experiences that makes you who you are! If people didn't go through all kinds of crap to get to where they are then most of them would really be pretty boring!.....Not that alot of them aren't anyway
Saw your blog when I logged in and it SO resonated with me. I'm divorced, have been for almost exactly three years and like you I've thought that my marital status is simply not anyone's business but my own.
I was married for almost 16 years, and while I don't have the same story you have, I do have the same reaction to the "scarlet letter D" that seems forced upon me whenever one of those forms pushes me toward a "category."
I've made the decision as I've been reading your words that from now on, I"m not going to participate in their process, I will not contribute to my own alienation or categorization. I will check the single box. And if as your other readers have suggested, they are askign for marketing purposes, even better to spoil their plans.
I don't want to be the target of marketing campaigns designed to appeal to divorced people. But even more pertinent, I suspect that divorced people are all so different from each other that it makes better sense to appeal to me on the basis of the fact that I'm a mom, that my income falls within a certain bracket, and that I'm a frugal spender rather than based on the far less important fact that I'm divorced.
Hugs
don't chill... let your feelings flow. Then sort them out and learn from them.
Nice blog.
yes yes yes. i totally agree with you. now for the rest of my life i have to check the damn box that says "divorced."
You go girl! That is only the business of who you want to hear it! I'd be the same way! You're either married or you're not! Your rant is totally justified!
Shhh. *calms the enraged kitten* shhhhhh... it'll be all-right.
I understand it... being that I'm divorced too. I also know why most of them do it (it's because they need to look for any previous used names). But it is frustrating... I like the ones that allow me to just check single or married! I find a few of those out there. LOL! I don't totally understand what I'm supppos to do if I get remarried for them to check all my last names though
When I read this I felt as is if I had written it. I, too, was divorced 3 years ago. I have been in a great loving committed relationship for over 2 years now, with a man I've known for 10 years. Yet, I always feel uncomfortable when I go to the doctors or any other place and they ask me what my marrital status is. Just last week I went to a new doctors and they asked if I was single and I told them I lived with someone. They said that wasn't an answer they could accept...I had to chose from Married, Divorced, or Single. What do women who have been in 10 year relationships who don't feel the need of the legal piece of paper do? Why must I forver check that little box that says divorced?
I feel that way about the ethnicity box.
But you are right - I dont' see what possible importance marital status information could have. Those forms are so unecessarily probing.
widow is tough too / also a strange label
that is soo true.
I don't like putting people in boxes period. Especially when there are no "air holes". I think you should check in all of them, since they all apply at one time or another. Imagine all the work it would generate if the bean counters had to call and request clarification every time.
I read in one of these comments that it should say married or unmarried--and this I agree with... also, doesn't it make more sense to use married/unmarried than single/married, because married/unmarried includes people who aren't MARRIED, but still not SINGLE? Agree though, the "divorced" thing makes no sense, as well as lack of "widowed."
Actually... I don't see why anybody cares in the first place. But okay.
Horray for you for checking "single."
Wow, this was incredible. Awesome post. So, I don't make those questionnaires that you have to fill out, so I don't know their logic behind it, but I'm wondering if it is because they want to know if you have ever gone by another name. I don't know, what do you think?
I don't know you, and I'm sure as hell not reading 59+ comments to see if someone else said the same thing, but here goes:
I think, at least when it comes to credit cards, that your marital status is a symbol of "real" income. When you're single, you'd have a lower gross income than if you are married ($2000 per month is definitely beat by $2000+$2000 per month, right?), and it would also be higher or lower depending on your age, because a 35 year old would most likely make more than an 18 year old doing the same job.
Now, when you check Divorce, the company has to add in extra variables. "Does this person still have settlements with his/her other? Did the other leave a lump of debt on this person's shoulders? Who gets the kids, house, car, etc? Will this person be able to survive on their own or is she/he even prepared to?" Divorce status is pretty much Single with added variables and unknowns. And you can't just say "They could always ask me" because they don't have the time nor interest, you know?
There are my 2 cents =)
hi im kyle...its nice to meet you...im new to xanga so when ever u get on can u help me?
you make a very good point.
You probably don't need a bijillionth comment, but I felt the need to sate my opinion too. It IS wrong and insensitive of companys, corparations and etc., but have they ever considered anyones feeling about anything but their product? My guess is they want your stastics. But don't care. If you want to check that single box, I suggest you do so, because if there isn't a widow or widower box, and they are required to check single and feel pain about saying it because they were once married, and probably very much in love. You just check the box you want to check. Because it's the box that makes you feel good about YOU. That is what you should bother with.
Sorry about the rant. I admit I saw you on featured. Sorry, hadn't heard 'bout you before.
*S*T*A*R*S*
I am from Hong Kong and just read your post, although I am only 20 yrs old, but I understand your feelings...hey please cheer up~ let bygone be bygone....next time maybe u can just tick the single box, coz u really deserve it....support u always..=3=
(sorry for my poor english, hope u can understand it lol)
I think you are perfectly justified in ranting. It's a stupid, discriminatory question. What does being divorced have to do with anything? Does it change what kind of person you are and whether you are responsible enough for paying your bills? No! It's in the past, over, done with, ended, finished, kaputz, not in the present. Go forward.
I always put down single. After a divorce, that's what you are - single. No one needs to know if I am divorced because it is unimportant.
I think you are perfectly justified in ranting. It's a stupid, discriminatory question. What does being divorced have to do with anything? Does it change what kind of person you are and whether you are responsible enough for paying your bills? No! It's in the past, over, done with, ended, finished, kaputz, not in the present. Go forward.
I always put down single. After a divorce, that's what you are - single. No one needs to know if I am divorced because it is unimportant.
I think you are perfectly justified in ranting. It's a stupid, discriminatory question. What does being divorced have to do with anything? Does it change what kind of person you are and whether you are responsible enough for paying your bills? No! It's in the past, over, done with, ended, finished, kaputz, not in the present. Go forward.
I always put down single. After a divorce, that's what you are - single. No one needs to know if I am divorced because it is unimportant.
What's with the triple posting?
Hey I just found your site through featured and figured I'd stop by. Your title to your blog looked interesting. I think the reason the ask if your are: Single, Married or Divorced when applying for the credit card is to probably see how you will be paying. If your single or divorced, you'll be paying the full bill by yourself. But, if your married maybe they think that because you have a spouse your spouse will help you foot the bill making it easier for them to give you the credit card.
A lot of times people are afraid of other single people. It scares them. Probably because they are afraid they'll end up just like them. In an episode of Sex & The City they talk of this related issue. And I guess they also want to know if your single is for another simple reason, "THEY'RE NOISY!" Frankly it's none of their business & if it's optional to answer some applications I don't think you should answer at all!
Well, take care.
*I'm also sorry that you are divorced. It must be hard for you.*
I've always been irritated by the same thing but for a different reason i am neither single nor married I have been with the same man for 4 years and we have 3 children we are happy together and I choose not to be married (although he has proposed) I will get married at my own pace not by society's and there is no box to check that states that while im not married yes there is someone else that splits the bills!!!
Ugh, I meant NOSEY my goodness!
But, what if you're not married nor are you single? THEN what? Pfft.
Marrige isnt even important anymore and I'm guessing that they think that divorced people are irrisponsible... bullshit.. My mom's divorce is getting finalized this comming friday. It's not her fault she thought she could change an alcohloic. They were together for 20 something years and she thought there was like no way out until she finnaly got her priories in order. It's better to be unhappy alone then be unhappy with someone. Im not saying your un-happy I just saying you made a good decision not to stick around for him to change [applauds]!
<3
more power to you!!!
Well single means the goods are not spoiled really, in the American "celibacy before marriage which is really just Gods blessing" kinda thing.
When you fill out the applications, they just want to know whether they will have to come collect you when we purge this country of evildoers.
I wouldn't worry too much...
http://www.youtube.com/v/8adonSA6yyw">
http://www.youtube.com/v/8adonSA6yyw">
definitely a scarlet letter!
You DO NOT need to take a chill pill. You have a GREAT point there! Although, after reading some of the other comments I also see how that would be useful for statistical purposes. UGH, tough world.
I've never thought about that. Hm...
If you feel single, check single.
Thats a damn good point, never thought about it before.
I guess it has something to do with the W4 form? I haven't filled out an application for a while, well the one that asks these kinds of questions (race, sex, etc...) ...
I just watched The Holiday; it's a good movie. Have you seen it?
The problem lies within our government and the society keeping their grip on us. Its a way for them to label us like cattle. A branding of there control over what people think about us. Its just one more way to seperate us by individuals......this group is single.....this group is married......this group is divored.......this group is widowed......they do this in many ways. But, we sit back and allow them too....so who is to blame.....not them.....us for allowing them to have that much power over us. They seperate us in different groups because if we were all in one group it would be harder for them to control us and for them to keep their hold on things. Such as there hold on energy.....gas......oil.......economy.....laws......jobs.......even down to what you wear......where you eat......who you have as friends....because of these labels they brand us with everyday.
i think it's just another demographic. you, as a divorcée, have lived a different life than just the run of the mill single person so you have a different take or point of view on things. it's marketing whether you like it or not...
i like your rant anyway...
you go girl!
I'm divorced and I found myself wondering the same question years ago when I was newly divorced. (Good to know now I'm not alone in thinking like this...) Announcing to someone (that I know personally) that I was divorced seemed at the time like an invasion of privacy into a part of my life that I was still coming to terms with. I have since then chosen to mark boxes that were appropriate for my needs. If it was advantageous of me to be "divorced" then I put it as so, otherwise I will most invariably state that I'm single. I mean come on, if we're doing this as a means of marketing research, shouldn't it be more specific? Single, In a relationship, Separated, Divorced, Widowed? Even then, I'm sure we couldn't encompass all the different social situations that could possibly occur....
Awesome!
I agree w/ another comment above, that that info is just used for ststistical/marketing data collection. BTW, while it has been said that 50% of all marriages end in divorce, the other 50% end in death. So you should consider yourself lucky. That said, I pray you're fortunate enough to find someone to "love you to death". In the meantime, don't worry. Be happy. God bless!
hi I don't no who you are. but you can be my friend
I dont see in any way how personal things like relationship status should matter on a resume... but thats just me
you have a great point. i think that some people are just too nosey, so they feel it's their right to ask. everyone should have a to privacy, even when filling out job applications or other documents. i agree 100%.
grr, i meant **right** to privacy
can they ask if u are divorce or not? i mean it's kinda REALLY personal...
I totally agree with you on this subject.i feel tha it should not matter either. when my mom got divorced she had the same trouble also. if she was still living i know she would totally agree with you too.
charliesgirl_21 (jess)
Do you like it the way I give it?
Gesundheit. What does that even mean? Don't people say that when they sneeze? I am rarely ever held, people use me like tissue paper. The skin under my nails bleed and turn black but I'm never encouraged. People have trouble communicating ideas. I know I do.
I don't care how they label me, just don't libel me. I was divorced three times. How's that for a glutton for punishment? But you anwered your own dilemma at the end of your rant, just put SINGLE.
This society we live in is too nosy anyway. They can all just kiss my ass. Ha ha ha!
I think you're onto something. I was married 17 years, and then my husband walked out on us. It's been five years since he split, and I think we should make a new time line where we become single. I mean, are we divorced like 10 years, and then we get to be single again?
I would be pissed off too...and I think you should just check single
coz you are!
0_0 I know. How is that even relevant? Its a double edged sword if your divorced and not in a relationship your single. But your still devorced. Yeah I'd just put single. Being divorced doesnt even matter. If your single then you are. But what if your not single but not married. Gawd thats confusing. I hear you. <3
Hmm, interesting point... ~Jetta
how is it done for 5 days
they need to add some new categories...how do these sound:
sleeping around
adulterer
widowed
bisexual
i don't know...maybe that would help them get the information they're really after!
Holy cow, I thought I was the only one who felt this way! Seriously, just because I've been through a divorce doesn't mean I'm not single.
there's also separated. Let's not forget that. It's almost worse than divorced because it's like purgatory.
Divorce is a really sad thing; it's symbolic of separating yourself from your earthly Christ know as a husband.(Godhead) It's something awesome to be married to fully love someone even if she is reading a book on a separate couch. It's like her presnce makes all the differance since I'm a guy.
It's like Christ in my Life. I surrendered myself so God could dwell in me and I mirror image of God himself. I do struggle with "brothers and sisters" "children of God. (God doesn't have grand children: thought I would throw that in) Even in my church remarried divorce people... we have 23 couples like that, although they are bond by sin everyday; each one of us live by God's mercy and grace. If I can't let someone else have the same mercy and grace I live by.... I wouldn't be giving them a chance to ask for forgiveness. I would be holding them in contempt. Having one scratch of ought toward anyone puts me in danger of hell fire.
I'm forgiven because it says in the Bible "He (God)is faithful to forgive" But it doesn't take away from myself; I didn't loose my right hand because I transgressed or I didn't loose my eyes from looking at prono. Having a child out of wed lock would tell me I'm a bastard and girlfriend is whore. These are just merly an example. I'm still marked by the choices I made.
So why you have to click divorced? It's a part of your life and a impedement if it's not known to the next guy in your life. The hardest thing in this life to do is keep on living.
I'm some random xanga guy.
Just check 'single', cuz, you are.
Yes. I agree. If society decides to distinguish the "divorcees" from the singles, why not decide to single out the "fired" from the "resigned?"
It's kind of annoying, and I understand why it bugs you so much. If I was reminded every time I went to do the most trivial task, such as fill out a membership to Target - just as you mentioned - I was reminded of a mistake that I deeply regretted, it would anger me, too.
Good luck!
Good entry! I agree with your point.
Wow. I never even thought of that. But I totally see what you mean.
That was an excellent analysis. I applaud your decision to check "single" instead of "divorced" since it doesn't make a difference if you WERE married versus whether you are now.
It's nice to see some pride in being single and trying to move on without being labeled.
-Angelina_Everlong
I love it!!! Student, non-student, flunked out. You are sooooo right and I share your pain! I really enjoyed your post. Please stop by my site sometime!!! Be Blessed!!! Susan
I agree with you, without a doubt.
society just wants a way to label it's people. you should hold your head up high that you are divorced. at least you were strong enough to say it's over and move on. my parents have been married over 23 years and i can't tell you a single time i've ever seen them appear remotely affectionate towards one another. their marriage is a business agreement. i would have loved if one or both would have agreed on a mutual disengagement, but neither of them were strong of enough to be alone again. you have my admiration. <3
You were on Xanga's front page & the title of your post really got me thinking... you pose a very interesting question. especially since I agree with you! Why is that the only choices? I don't feel that you should have to answer that unless you are filling out information about maybe insurance or dependents...
Nice post.
I love this blog. It makes so much sense. You can't understand why they're telling you to distinguish yourself as divorced instead of just single becuase it does not make sense. You can't make sense of what doesn't make sense in the first place.
You are single and divorced. Being divorced does not affect them in the slightest. So as far as they need to know, you are single and that is all there is to it. You define yourself as you are.
my parents are getting divorced =[
i hope they still love me
you got a point.
I noticed you from Featured...I agree, either you are married or you are single. Relationships have fallen under so much scrutiny lately. Society wants to put a label on everything. If they are going to have "Divorced" as a check box, where is the "engaged", "dating", "long term relationship with no plans to marry", etc??? Seems to be those would also be appropriate.
Hope you have a great weekend!
...you made a good point!
hi
I was unable to read every comment due to time constraints, so forgive me if anything here has been said already. Heheh. So, yes I agree wholeheartedly with what your saying. It is unfair, thoughtless and generaly lazy to simply continue what has for years been an endless march of generalisation and pidgeonholes. And of course, what about those people (like me) who are neither married nor single. I wouldn't consider myself single (i.e. available, looking for a partner, not with anyone) but I'm not married, nor do I intend to be in the near future. There are two important women in my life. One who I love with all my heart, who I don't really see anymore. And one who is somehow more than just my best friend, but I wouldn't call us together. People need to stop ticking boxes and signing dotted lines. What does that tell them about us anyway? They don't know me, they don't know you. Down with the boxes. Oh, good entry by the way. >D ;9
Rant over.
Lakaeos Angelus.
http://www.xanga.com/shrouded_half_angel
hi are u new because i am
HEY I WOULD JUST SAY THAT IM MARRIED AND IF THEY ASK FOR UR HUSBANDZ NAME MAKE UP A GUYZ NAME THAT UR CHRUSHING FOR OR/ A GUYZ NAME ITZ THAT EASY BUT, I DONT NOW HOW IT IS BECAUSE IM IN A REALETATIONSHIP SO GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i would give you a million props. you don't need to chill out; you're fabulous as it is. thanks for your honest post. it's refreshing.
Wow, I never really thought about that. I agree with you!
check the "single" box. you are now single.
that a girl!
why is there no "widowed" then??
good for you! check the "single" box.
Excellent point! Why is it that one must ANNOUNCE to the world that they are divorced!
Man... I have been feeling the same damn way for 5 years now... thanks for sharing...
i don't want you to be offended, but those are there for credit ratings in some situations. When you divorce your credit rating can drop. When credit cards see that you had a significant drop they can deny you, but if they see you are divorced then they realize how that can change your credit rating and they ignore the drop and approve you
Check single. None of their business. Lisa
I know I don't know you but I stumbled across your blog and I def. have to agree with you.
I've never been married (I'm still very young at 19) but even still, I don't think it's fair. Like you said you're either single or you aren't.
I think people are just too nosy, most questions on things you fill out aren't really necessary their prob. just for statistics anyway.
I just started college and my eyes have been opened to the "real world" and how hypocritical and stupid it really is. This is just another one of those things that I never really gave any thought to until now.
Anyway just thought I'd comment and say that I agree and that you SHOULD just mark single because you are!
Wow. That is a really good question. It's completely ridiculous for applications to even have that box.
i like the "flunked out" option. lol.
OMG, I absolutely LOVED this post! Your logic is SPOT ON. Especially loved how you compared it to student status. Go on Girl, check that Single box!!! Major props to you!!!
In the Bahamas it's Married or SPINSTER! That's what they refer to single women as, regardless of age. eek.
no chill pill needed! your rant is completely valid. i am divorced and i hate being reminded of it too.
I've been married for 17 years & My Oldest daughter is 16 ( Honeymoon Baby) & I have a boy at age 13 & My youngest is a girl at 8 years old. I'm thinking of divoicing My Husband ( Not for cheating or lying), Our Oldest has been playing head games & thinks She's older( An Adult) & I'm sick of fighting with Him because when it comes to His Parenting Skills... Well, He Sucks in this area. I love all 3 of the kids, But I can't stand the way she gets away with trashing me in front of Her Brother, Sister & Her Own Father & if you visit my site... mytrailingsofhavingkids , You see my updates on what the oldest has done!!
i can understand that...
in employment, it would only effect, if children were involved, insurance, and in case of emergency... etc. that too on the collage app. wanting to be sure they had all contact information,.... you Legally can make Single, if that describes you best.
Create your own little box that reads "other" and check it. That would throw them for a loop.
I am twice-divorced due to two really unreliable and neurotic husbands. Talk about a 'stigma'. It's the only thing in my life I would change. People tell me that it's no big deal, but it's a HUGE deal to me. H-U-G-E. I feel like it was my last chance. I'm done. I'm 'retired' from marriage, you know?
I always check the 'Single' box.
There are black and white, but they belong to a category of 'colour'. Clever you can get what I wanna say~
I know exactly how you are feeling.. I couldn't have said it any better.
yes you are ranting hun, lol! but its ok! coz that really sucks ... good observation actually ... I never really noticed that 'til i read your post ...
Yeah I don't get that either. Marketing purposes I imagine. Marketing anything drives me bonkers. No I won't tell you my zip or area code. Deal. Anyway, found you on the main page. Good rant.
i would check the "single" box also if i ever get a divorce. personal is personal because some mistakes are better left in the back of your mind, not for the whole world to know.
haha. sorry i'm so random.
i just saw it & thought it was a great thing what you pointed out. i never even thought about it.
Marriage is a life long promise. When you divorce, you've break that promise. Isn't it reasonable that you should bare some responsibility on that? Instead of blaming the other half for 100% of it?
Or looking at it the other way around. If you have the guts to do it, dont be ashame to admit it. You are divorced, Big deal. Why do u have to hide it and say u r single.
excuses are like assholes, everyone has it but no one wants to hear it
yo,comment me
sexyluv3
yo,comment me
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Yeah, that irritates me as well. I'm not quite sure why they do that, but I'm sick of having to put "divorced." I was married almost five years, and I've been divorced almost a year now. Maybe they throw us into a "oh-she's-divorced-she's-probably-a-bad-risk-because-she-couldn't-make-her-marriage-last" category.
Either way, enjoy being single!
my mom got divorced 2 times
I agree with Low Mom, that's basically it in a nutshell. Though for a credit card, it might have more to do with your credit status.
I would definently check single.
-M
while I know that on certain forms it is important to distinguish if you have been married or not, such as governmental papers dealing with social security and whatnot, I think it is totally up to the person on what box they choose.
Personally I would check the single box.
Of course that is what I would do.
Hey! I saw your entry on Xanga's front page, and the title got me. Most of the time I don't think this question should be asked, but for me it's a totally different reason. My dad passed away a while ago, and I just know how hard it's been for my mom with these types of questions. Married, Single, or Divorced? What if you're widowed? Most places don't include that, so she never really knows what she should put because she doesn't consider herself single, yet the world doesn't consider her married. I just don't think it's an appropriate question and I wish it wasn't asked as often as it is.
yea, tick single
feel happy and have a good week!!!
im going thru a divorce right now cuz my husband couldnt keep his pants up. i agree with everything you said. why should i have to announce to perfect strangers that my marriage couldnt last? why is that there business? and for someone in this situation that word only makes it hurt worse. I AM DIVORCED!!! does the world feel better now that i announced it?
saw this heading on the frontpage. I completely agree with you. I am not officially divorced but I am seperated. Why can't that be a choice? Check box if you are seperated...check box if it was NOT your fault! at least if they are going to know our marital status they might as well know whose fault it was! good blog.
it's so they can check any possible last names to get a complete and accurate credit history. but i never really thought of it that way, so i feel you.
don't know why divorced is on applications. seems pretty useless in most cases.
If being divorced doesn't matter, then what's the point in saying that you're married or single?
Hey how are ya i know how it feels look come to my site an leave me a message and we can chat alright. peace by the way your beautiful
i agree with you. i am divorced myself and it doesn't help that i am considered "too young" to be divorced... thus the stigma stings even more painful. i am cast aside as an irresponsible teenager who gave in to marriage too early even though they had no idea whatsoever happened to my marriage and the stuff i endured in order to try to make it work.... oh! the humanity.
p.s. your entry inspired me to say something about being divorced too.... i hope you don't mind that i will take the photo you provided above.. i think it pretty much encompasses the whole idea. thanks! take care! -di
Well, I tried to think of a way to start this entry, but couldn't come up with anything that was 'nice'. My starters all started with "haha," or "that made me laugh" then I read it---man that'd piss me off if someone wrote that. You know, since it's something that bothers you and I'm laughing. ANYWAY, my point is that I agree. I think that we as a society get caught up in labels. It's dumb. I agree, but I think some of it is worth the cause; however, if it's making you feel bad You should do what you think is right. Like checking 'single'.
HAve a good one!
Anyway, that's my attempt to feel important for the day.
good point!
I think you should check all three boxes. You were single at one time, you were married at one time and you were divorced at one time. All boxes apply!
ps I'm going to start doing that too!
When I told my mother I was getting divorced, the first thing she told me was how ashamed of me she was. That was seven years ago. Sh swears she didn't mean it, but those words are forever burned in my mind. Everytime I saw that little box on an application, I remembered that. Remembered how I needed her and she couldn't see past her shame to help me. Gah. It sucks.
I dont blame u i mean yea i'm single and have never been married but my mother has been married twice and the fist time she got divorced and was left in the same situation u are in and now she is happily married again the point i'm trying to make is that a status is just a status u should let it make u feel down...ur obviously more happy divorced (in other words Single) or u wouldnt have gotten divorced...its no one elses business what ur status is i agree but why let it bring u down?
I've seen where they have boxes for widowed and separated on some forms too.
Hey, I'm only eleven, but I totally agree that it's stupid to think of "divorced" and "single" as different things. If you are divorced, then... obviously, you are single. And i completely agree with unfulfilledpromises: they should think of including a "widow" box if they are insensitive enough to put a "divorced" box.
Jesus Christ. *sighs*
Stupid people.
yeah, sometimes it makes me sad that i can't be asian and american at the same time.
The main reason why they ask if your married, singl, or divorced when filling out a credit application, is that your maiden name may have been different then your married name. I dont think it has anything to do with them trying to point that out, and try make you feel worst then you already do about the whole ordeal.
My wife of 11 years cheated on me with our plumber and had his baby. I want a box to check that says: "Abandoned".
Jake
-.--.--.-
Oh I agree completely! A person is either Single or Married. That's it. There are no other options. I work at a college, and on our admissions application, under marital status, we give all these choices...single, married, divorced, separated, widowed... That's ridiculous. Everyone starts off life single, and barring a tragic accident involving both of you, half of us will end this life single.
GOOD FOR YOU i am 18 years old and NO WHERE NEAR being graduated from college, let alone married (AND I'm gay on top of all that lol) but i AM going to go for my masters in marriage and family therapy. i feel like an idiot for not realizing that first. this is very brilliant. simple, obvious yet brilliant and MAD props to you for ranting about it. you have every right to. i'm just...i feel so empowered for just having read this. you just put some sunshine in my day. thank you. and bless your wonderful mind
xox
starry_night_sky_23
I see your point, but the question is if you are legally married or not, not if you are happy, lonely, unhappy, wounded, high etc. That would be far more personal. We all hate to be reminded of our mistakes. Better to think about happier times.
Forms are stupid. Check whatever you like. None of their business anyhow.
I hear ya!I feel the exact way and have been checking the box "single" for the last 6-8 months. I felt like i was lying at first...guilty of high treason, but then i thought, I'm single, have no kids. And i shouldn't have to have someone think of me as trash just because of what happened before. It total sucks and i wish they did change the freakin boxes (perhaps .... single, slacker, still single, married, still married, in jail, old-timer). Great entry!!!
Heh, I read many of the comments others have left but couldn't definitely read them all. I am totally single, and always have been, so I had thought about that. That totally sucks. I know for some forms, it can be important. Some people's theories on here about how they need to know if you had a different name since many people change their last name when they get married, it could be important, but MOST things it wouldn't matter. Someone mentioned widowed in a comment. I mean, if you were widowed would you really want to put down single? So many times they ask such stupid irrelevant questions. Checking single would seem to be the smartest for you for a majority of forms. Obviously government forms could be different. Anways, interesting post - I love those that make me think.
Agreed...never thought about it but its true.
SWEETIE:
It goes like this.....
You start young and dumb and SINGLE. Then you get MARRIED.
Once you get Married, SOCIETY accepts you as a unit, a result of the pressure to go from single to married, and thus the frustration you feel as being DIVORCED.
I'm all three at some point in time. It's one of those lesson's life treats you to. I've been single, married, divorced, and re-married. My current status is married. That whole fiasco cost me years of my life, and now I pay child support and jump through hoops to hold it all together. I had 2 kids to the first, 1 to the second, and a step-daughter.
I'm just getting my wind. The 2 to the first are 13 (boy), and 9 (girl), the step-daughter is 14, and the newest addition is 3 (boy). My situation is complicated as hell. Count a divorce with no kids lucky......
Anyway, they have that "divorced" status to define your place in society. Don't bitch about it. If newly divorced you got 3 years to wait. Count 3 years from the date your divorce was final. SIGH.
Once you have tasted the married life YOU can never say you are single. EVER again. Being married is a test of every fiber of your being, and once you have lived through that, you know the "single" classification is ONLY reserved for those young and dumb. Once married, and divorced, you should hold your head high and say "I survived that shit and got rid of him/her". It wrecks your mind to know you gave a vow to a person, to be with them, then to see it go to shambles. You say "divorced" rather than "single" because it sets you aside from others and they know you aren't "young and dumb" but rather "seasoned". If you tell someone you are divorced, they will KNOW you went through hell and back, but if you tell them you are single, they'll say, hey, I know this cute person to hook you up with. At your age, you can't afford to play games. The truth strikes a stronger chord.
So don't be ashamed of your past. Look to the future. Stick to your values, and figure out who you are before trusting another male again.
Yep, I just strayed by from a link off the main page. Thot I'd give my 2 cents.
PEACE.
You are single, and it is none of their business otherwise.
Go ahead and circle single! Nobody needs to know your business.
maybe its just a way to see who has moved on. *shrug*
I'm going through that now. I'm getting a divorce now and I remember the first form I saw that had the MSDW. What the hell am I going to circle?! Im still married... getting a divorce... but single... beinga widow would be nice... hum... shit...
So after ten minuets of staring at this small box on a legnthy medical form I decide to leave it blank. There are alot of boxes and info on here, maybe the secretary won't see that I left it blank... maybe if I took an x-acto knife and cut out the little box. I mean I was really flipping out over the unjustice of this question. I'm in NO position to handle this sort of thing now, sprung up on me when I was having such a good day, and really this has nothing to do with my medical info as a patient. (The secretary actually did notice I left the MSDW blank, and I told her quietly my stance and she circled the S and wrote separated.)
So yes. I agree with you 100%. We shouldn't have to wear this scarlet letter D on our chest in soceity. All the questions from nosey acuqantinces... stupid forms... making me want to be dishonest and skip the D and edge my pen towards the S....
At least you can know your not in this alone... and the rest of us scarlet ladies are going through it too... perhaps we should riot the system...
~Vitsmouth
Ive been divorced twice.(always threw a big Just Divorced party and drove around with Just Divorced shoe polished on my windows too)
But I always mark single.I am single.I never mention the divorced part.
Mark single because you are single!
hello
im proud to write you a comment.
totally agree with you.
ha.im a student in hong kong
i agree with you that there are a large number of DISCRIMINAION.
what the hell.
i support the decision you made
check SINGLE!
I felt this way when I first got divorced, too. I talked to my cousin (also divorced after a relatively short marriage) and he was like, "Fuck those boxes, I always check single!" It's amazing how much better that makes you feel.
I always thought that was kind of weird. There's no reason not to check the "single" box.
Then just check single! Who cares, like anyone is going to know! If it bothers you that much, then why are you doing it?
I am also very young and "divorced". I usually just check single
I would have checked the single box all along. People wnat too much informaton anymore when it is none of their business
I agree... go ahead, check single!!!
I so agree!!!!!! I've been married for one year and one month...HOWEVER I have been in the process of a divorce for 9 months!! lol. So I know what you mean...it's ridiculous.
Keep checking the 'single' box.
Try being divorced and a lesbian... there's no box for that. Most applications don't even have an "other" box to be checked. So, I typically check single or write in "Other" or "Partnered"... depending on my mood and the application. I understand your frustration completely.
That's really messed up...
I've never really noticed that those are the only three choices though....my parents are divorced, but I never noticed it
Hmm...that's really odd
But what you wrote is really...inspiring I guess is the best way to explain it.
-Rosie-
Well, if you're divorced .... then, you're divorced. Right? Divorced isn't 'single'. Single normally means ... never been married.
good. check the damn single box. good for you!
how about been there done that dont want to do it again
From one "SINGLE" to another..............I am with ya!!! Great fun post!
I'm divorced also... I just pick single.. I agree with what you have said in your blog.
If a further explanation is needed later on then so be it.. but straight off the bat when filling any form I can't imagine it's there for any other reason then for the people being nosy.
hmmm...I don't know you, I just saw this on the featured pages on xanga, but this is interesting...I like your analogy with "student" "non-student" and "flunked out"...because divorced is essentially single in function and it really doesn't make sense that credit card forms or anything like that would need to know if you are "divorced and single" or "never-been-married single". If they want to know if you are divorced...then why don't they want to know if you are unmarried but living with a significant other, or something like that? very interesting...
sorry, I'm just speculating now...but I do hope you continue to heal and live your own life. I don't know if you are religiously inclined or not, but I will pray for you anyway.
Preach on, girl! I was married for two years, and have been divorced for almost 5 years. I stopped checking the divorced box. It's repulsive. What can it possibly tell people? Do they look at us as quitters, as unreliable for credit? Can it show them all the crap we put up with, all the hurts we suffered, all the emotional pain and trauma we've had to endure and heal on our own? No, so it tells them nothing. Nothing about us, anyway.
I've often felt this same emotion when I tell people I was married before. There's a moment of shock, and then a kind of ... disappointment might not be the right word. But, a reappraisal of me, in a sense. And I want to scream, "What?! What do you think that tells you?!"
My sister, (also divorced) says it tells them only this, That We Own Up To and Correct Our Own Mistakes.
1. Perhaps they want to know if you think before making choices; ie: Marriage
2. Even being a student or not a student has the grey areas.
wow, I have never thought of that. I've never been married so, of course, I get the easy option of checking single. This all fits right in with what I've been studying in soc this last term- As you said, what's the point? It's kind of like racial profiling, relationship profiling. Do you think divorced people have certain privileges held back simply because they're divorced.
Hey I know how you feel. My ex wife was pretty much a good match for yours. I almost feel embarassed to fill in the divorced box at times. I now mark it single as well. I have beeen divorced for almost a year now and feel singled out by this annoyance. Good point sister! I really never gave it much thought till now, but I have the same vise with those unpersonal boxes that really don't matter, but it does seem to make the difference on how they treat you.
I'm kind of new to this site and i like yours so, first of all it's not your fault or mistake for believing in good in life and trusting in your relationship. DO NOT EVER think it was your fault, that you made a mistake. So just take what you can from the memory and it's over. it's in the past. not present or future. Good luck on your future life. As for the app forms well, if it was some kind of work app then yes i could understand the reason for liking to know if the person ur getting did have some kind of relationship before. that's just policy . But yes u don't have to do anything u don't like. And really ur not lying when you say ur single right.
Best of luck and be happy.
i know how you feel. i went through that 5 years ago when i got divorced. checking the 'divorced' box sucked. you're going to be fine.
I guess it's just a formality. The law doesn't have any special financial rules that apply to people dating, like it does to those who are married or divorced. That's pretty much it. They ask about what could possibly affect them.
Saw this blog on the Xanga main page and the title just intrigued me to click and read the rest of it!
) I completely agree w/ you on the whole Single, Married or Divorced... why do they need to know? Will their life stop if you refuse to answer? Why does your marital status depend on whether or not you get employed or credit somewhere? Blah... it's just dumb.
Maybe next time you should try adding in your own marital status... like Unknown.
)
Feel free to stop by my site anytime!
)
You're right... I haven't really thought about it that way before since I'm only 19
i'm divorced but i check single. there's definitely a prevalent bias.
l want to meet you
Man, thanks for allowing me to put myself in your shoes. I honestly wouldn't want a scarlet "D" on each application I put in for anything.
Well, where I work at Macys we sometimes have had problems with people using credit cards that are under other names. So maybe these other places have that box to check so that dishonest people can't use a name thats no longer theres to buy things.
However, it can be frustrating to ahve to be identified that way because of others not doing the right thing..also, like the guy up above stated about the research some companies like to do, certain things divorced person may buy or something.
wow, i've never thought about that. cuz it doesn't apply to me.
i think there should be a fourth box for most states in the union:
well-i-WOULD-be-married-but-my-legistlature-is-made-up-of-bigoted-morons
massachusetts can pass on this one ^.^
ct, nj, and vermont can slap their little civil-unioned checkboxes on there instead.
all to true and i can relate hope things get easier for you and wish you the best.
OMG YES! I completely agree. I get rather upset about things like that -- medical forms usually -- and I just want to check everything that applies.
You ARE single. And, best of luck to you for future relationships.. Everyone doesn't cheat. There are some loyal and decent humans out there!!
Christy
My parents got divorced. And my mom is now on her third marriage.
So I know how it is for the most part.
Think of it this way...you are single. Just because you got a divorce doesn't mean that it should label you. Technically, you are single. So have fun. =]
Technically there's 4. You forgot Widowed.
Well, I certainly don't see why you can't check the single box. Go you!
I love your thoughts. I had never thought about this before, but I definitely see where you are coming from, and I will certainly think of you everytime I come across this in the future. And I'm sorry this has affected you the way it has. I guess we just aren't aware of the implications of our actions and how they can affect others. I just wish whoever came up with the "divorce" option could hear your testament. Stay strong, and stay true to your beliefs.
Best wishes*
It’s a story of mine. I wear the links of london in my whole life. No one knows why I love so much the ring. I also don’t know why. We even don’t know what his name is and how old he is and where he come and went. It really likes a ridiculous story. But I have a proof that is the links of london jewellery ring. It’s neither a dream nor a girl’s imagination.
I don’t know if you can see this article, if you can remember the period happiness, I hope you can have a happy life.